50 Songs in 50 Weeks

by Jake Haws

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about

50 original songs recorded over the course of 50 weeks and documented in the blog 50songsin50weeks.blogspot.com. Subscribe to the "Jake Haws Music Podcast" to hear the songs broken down track by track.

credits

released December 31, 2012

All songs written and performed by Jake Haws
All songs recorded at Jake's house except "The Golden Age" recorded at Studio Y and "Outside" and "Fictional Heroes" recorded at Muse Recording Studio.
Cover Photo by Melissa Dupree Haws
Design by Jake Haws

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Jake Haws Orem, Utah

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Track Name: Song #1: 4th of July
The bright lights, the explosions in the sky
All the comfort of a picnic on a warm summer evening in July

A parade marches down the street
All the people exchanging friendly greetings, rearranging the order

Well I’m leaving, on the 4th of July,
On the 4th of July, I’m leaving

Wooden stands, all the children bumming quarters off their parents
Sipping cold lemonade from a paper cup, it’s so sweet

Well we’re broke, we spent that last $20 on explosives
Now we’re wandering around every corner of their town
Looking for newer forms of entertainment

Well I’m leaving, on the 4th of July,

On the 4th of July, I’m leaving

Then I came to the next town over
All the kids in the city, they were pretty tired of the disorder

All the pain of cleaning up the decorations,
Well I guess it went well so we can bottle up and sell it to the next town
Well I’m leaving
Track Name: Song #2: When I Was Young
When I was young, things used to be so easy
I never had to worry about a thing
When I was young, I used to have crazy dreams
Like I could fly a rocket into space

Well don’t leave me now, my love
Don’t leave me now, my love
Don’t leave me now, I’m on my knees

Cause I don’t want to be another person afraid to see
That what we are is what we’ll always be
And I don’t want to see another day where I have to be
Something that I know I can not be, I guess we’ll see

When I young, I looked up to everything
Cause everything seemed wonderful to be
When I was young, I went for walks in the dark
To see if there was something in the trees

Well don’t leave me now, my love
Don’t leave me now, my love
Don’t leave me now, I’m on my knees

Cause I don’t want to be another person afraid to see
That what we are is what we’ll always be
And I don’t want to see another day where I have to be
Something that I know I can not be, I guess we’ll see
Track Name: Song #3: The Golden Age
Every passing moment spent, my whole world is caving in
Truth evolves in subtle ways, changing slowly every day

In a thousand years from now, drifting to a smaller town
I can’t find the meaning in, words replaced with ignorance

Breaking from the myth that kept us down so many years
Everything erased, exactly how it was before the golden age

Lost inside a crowded street, voices always fail to speak
Comfort from the safest place leaves another another vacant space

Breaking from the myth that kept us down so many years
Everything erased, exactly how it was before the golden age

Before the golden age
Track Name: Song #4: Outside
The days were passing by
I can see them now
and I was living life outside
on my own

I was wrong when I lied
Please be strong and let it all outside again

The nights were calling me
How I tried to sleep
and I was living life outside
on my own

I was wrong when I lied
Please be strong and let it all outside again
And I can’t complain
Cuz I still remain
And I can’t explain
Why I still remain outside
Track Name: Song #5: Petals + Roses
Waiting for the right time to speak
Staring at the ceiling trying to sleep
And I’ll pray for you
I will pray for you

Sitting in the darkness by your side
Hiding all the thoughts up in my mind
And I’ll say to you
I will be your friend

It’s just a chance we take without
ever really knowing how it ends

I’ll be there for you
I will be your friend

It’s just a chance we take without
ever really knowing how it ends
It’s just a chance we take without
ever really knowing how it ends
Track Name: Song #6: Apology
She’s got a perfect smile and she never has the time to see
I’m feeling so alone. I’m withered on my own and she’s not home

Living through the days where everything just floats away into
The corner of my mind and could you be so kind to let me know

Better days are on their way again
And having you there lets me know
That I won’t have to take it on my own
And I’m still acting out my last apology

I’m sick of guarantees and always feeling incomplete, it seems
To hit me like a ton of bricks. I’m dreaming when my time is running thin

She is my only choice cuz when I listen to her voice it’s like
A sparrow in the wind. She whispers out my name and I give in

Being with you I can be myself
And I don’t have to act so strange
Well you won’t ever have to stand alone
And I’m still acting out my last apology

Better days are on their way again
And having you there lets me know
I’m sick of always feeling out of time
And I’m still acting out my last apology
Track Name: Song #7: I Waited For You
I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do
I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do

I want it so bad I don’t know why
Searching for answers I just wanna cry
Tell me what it is I can do for you
I just want you to notice that I’m there

I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do

I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do

I wanted so bad to hear your voice
I was convinced there was no choice
You get to the point where you no longer see
Our greatest thoughts and mysteries have nothing to do with me

I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do

I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do

An hour later you stop on by
And waste my time again with another lie
Tell me what it is I can for you
I just want you to notice that I’m here

I waited for you the whole night through
I waited for you and I don’t know what to do
I waited for you
I waited for but it’s too late and I just wanna cry
Track Name: Song #8: Beyond My Control
You think by now I’d have learned my lesson
To never buy into the lies
You’ll go far with ambition they told me
And it never hurts to keep trying

But there are things beyond my control
My ambition is digging a hole

Up again at 2:30 in the morning
My wandering mind just can’t sleep
There’s gotta be a better way to make use of my time
The story can’t stay incomplete

Because there’s things beyond my control
My restlessness is taking a toll
You can keep on telling me that there’s somewhere I should be
But I still fall short of the goal

Maybe in the morning I will put it all into perspective
and maybe I will see a better day then I predicted

But there’s things beyond my control
Pessimism is taking a toll
Now I’m waiting for my day to come
The calendar changes but it’s never the one
Track Name: Song #9: Predictions
You say that I have seen a ghost
And I’ve become too naive to know
And it’s too late to alter my fate

I don’t wanna hear your predictions
Take me down the road where I left off
I don’t wanna hear your predictions
When you tell it like it is again

And now I walk a path unknown
It takes me time to stop these crimes

I don’t wanna hear your predictions
Take me down the road where I left off
I don’t wanna hear your predictions
When you tell it like it is again

And you tell it like it is again
Track Name: Song #10: Fictional Heroes
All the fictional heroes saving fictional cities
From disasters that only television can make
Then as I’m watching the villains stepping right in the way
I keep saving myself from making bigger mistakes
Give me a reason to watch then everything is fine by me

And the fictional victims are attempting to flee
From the big budget disaster that’s so hard to believe
Looking for something to keep them in a safe place again
And I’m hiding away in places I’ve never been
But if we cover our tracks then there isn’t a chance they’ll find me

And it never is what it seems
Until we’re watching the final scene
And the fictional heroes talk
As if there’s nothing wrong at all

And a fictional murder keeps me dieing again
and yet I’m feeling alive more than I ever have been
I’m stepping out of a conflict and resolving the plot
And all the fictional people think I’m something I’m not
They say that people can change but they never move more than an inch

As we act out the final scene
It seems the plot is still incomplete
And the fictional heroes talk
As if there’s nothing wrong at all

And it never is what it seems
Until we’re watching the final scene
And the fictional heroes talk
As if there’s nothing wrong at all
Track Name: Song #11: Change My Design
Today I’m gonna drift away
And I know that I can’t stay and live with myself
Only one thing is sure in my mind

I needed your love everyday
And I know it’s my mistake I’ll have to live with
And I hope it’s not too late to be there

So change my design and keep me in mind
Please decide the fate of my heart
And keep me in mind I’m leaving behind
Any doubts I had in my heart

Well if I was wrong then I
Hope you’ll move on your own
Without any pain
If you need me I will be waiting when you call

But in time you’ll see all the while
You needed me to be in your arms
And I noticed your burning inside

So change my design and keep me in mind
Please decide the fate of my heart
And keep me in mind I’m leaving behind
Any doubts I had in my heart

In my heart
In my heart
In my heart
In my heart
In my heart

So change my design and keep me in mind
Please decide the fate of my heart
And keep me in mind I’m leaving behind
Any doubts I had in my heart
Please decide the fate of my heart
Please decide the fate of my heart
Track Name: Song #12: Hello Hello
Hello Hello, Where are you?
Step into the plane
The plans are all arranged

Hello Hello, Where are you?
A Million miles away
And not a bit delayed

All the time I spent away has made a change
I always thought that it would be a big mistake
I was wrong

All of the chance, all of the doubt
The plane is crashing down
Survivors bailing out

Gather around, Gather around
The rescue’s on it’s way
The story’s getting out

Situations turn around and make a change
I always thought that it would be a big mistake
Looking back through time is such a waste
Cause moving forward I can find
A destination leading to place in the cloud
All the times that I have failed to work things out
Change who you are
Cause it don’t mean a thing if you don’t get to far
I guess we’ll see

Hello Hello, Where are you?
A Million miles away
And not a bit delayed
Track Name: Song #13: I Needed More
We’re all, we’re all here begging on our knees for you
Silent, silent spaces left for us to wonder

I needed more, my time has come
Again I cry
What can I do, I need someone to tell me why

Falling, falling faster I think I lost my place
Happily, ever after a smile on your face

I needed more, my time has come
Again I cry
What can I do, I need someone to tell me why

I needed more, my time has come
Again I cry
What can I do, I need someone to tell me why

I needed more, I needed more
I needed more, I needed more
Track Name: Song #14: Lonely Day
I am feeling all alone when you’re not there
And I am feeling safe all alone and I’m not scared

And now I’ve gone too far I can’t go back

I am feeling all alone when you’re not there
And I am feeling safe all alone and I’m not scared

And now I’ve gone too far I can’t go back

Must have been a lonely day
I can hardly speak at all
And I see you waiting there

Fade away until I’m gone

Must have been a lonely day
I can hardly see at all
But I see you waiting there

Fade away until I’m gone
Until I’m gone
Track Name: Song #15: Anonymous
Hello to me, to say I know
To want and dream, your need to fall

For you I die, the tears we cry
I know your face all too well

You never know why we came
You never know what to say
I finally found that I was much more than
I can be alone

To speak and sign
Your heart will try
I wanted nothing but the best for you

I am so in love with you
And I don’t think it will ever pass
I want you so bad but I don’t know what to say
Well I can’t be with you

You never know why we came
You never know what to say
I finally found that I was much more than
I can be alone alone alone

In space you hide, the dark your guide
The pain it brings to end with goodbye
Track Name: Song #16: Over Me
Watching the sun rise
Nothing’s quite the same
Shadows fade away
The light dries up the rain
You wonder who you are
You seem to be alright

Tell me now, how is the sky over me
How are the stars over me
How are the birds over me
How are the clouds over me

Everywhere you go
You stop and say hello
Just wanted to belong
A place to call your home
You wonder who you are
You seem to be alright

Tell me now, how is the sky over me
How are the stars over me
How are the birds over me
How is this love over me

Anything you want
Anything you want
Anything you want
Anything you want is yours
Track Name: Song #17: No Wall
Give me one more try to make things right,
I’ll make it up to you
And I will be right where I belong,
For a night or two, yeah

How far we go depends on you
Whether I’m right or wrong
How far we go depends on you
And I’m standing by

There’s no wall to walk behind
There’s no place for me to hide
When I’m away from you
There’s no wall to walk behind
There’s no place for me to hide
When I’m away from you

Turn me inside out define the flaws
and pinpoint the lies,
And you’ll never doubt that I was wrong
Never wonder why, yeah

How far we go depends on you
Whether I’m right or wrong
How far we go depends on you
And I’m standing by

There’s no wall to walk behind
There’s no place for me to hide
When I’m away from you
There’s no wall to walk behind
There’s no place for me to hide
When I’m away from you

We always dreamed that there was more
But we’d never find the door,
To escape from here
There’s no wall to walk behind
There’s no place for me to hide
When I’m away from you
Track Name: Song #18: I'll Sit Here and Wait
The days pass and I’ve gone nowhere
I sit and let you talk to me
When will I get to know you
You said I guess we’ll see

The days keep getting longer
The sun keeps shinning in your eyes
Stay, stay with me tonight.

We can’t walk away from this today
I don’t know where I’ll go tomorrow
Til I know I’m go and ready
I’ll sit here and wait
I’ll sit here and wait

I should have seen it coming
I thought that everything was alright
Stay, stay with me tonight.

We can’t walk away from this today
I don’t know where I’ll go tomorrow
Til I know I’m go and ready
I’ll sit here and wait
I’ll sit here and wait
Track Name: Song #19: The One I Love
Valentine’s Day I was so anxious that I sighed
I’ve never seen a face so beautiful
It’s like the day that we first met
There’s not a chance that I’ll forgot the way
The way you had that look in your eyes

You are the one I love
I want to spend the rest of my life living by your side
You know that you are the one I love
And every single day I try to give my heart away to you

Did you keep all the letters that I wrote while I was away?
There are so many things for me to say
Do you remember the Rose Gardens at Thanksgiving Point?
Oh I never will forget that night

Don’t be afraid
I’ll keep you safe

You are the one I love
I want to spend the rest of my life living by your side
You know that you are the one I love
And every single day I try to give my heart away to you

I do
Track Name: Song #20: Dad
I got one eye open while I'm trying to sleep
The baby keeps crying I can't get a wink
So I'm waiting for you, love
It's your turn to get up

Rocking this boy past quarter to three
The kid won't rest he's got somewhere to be
So I'm I'm rocking the night away
I can sleep it off in the day
At least I think so

Well if the chance I would do it again
Cause I ain't gonna spend my life complainin'
Yes I won't
It takes a lot work to let the children play
But I guess it's just the price that you gotta pay to be a dad

The kid keeps crawling around the house
And has an accident on the wife' favorite blouse
But it's gonna be okay
I didn't like that one anyway.

Keep wanting to go to the park
And won't come home until it's after dark
Well I'm calling out your name
I love you all the same but you're still grounded

Well if the chance I would do it again
Are you really sure you wanna have another kid
Well I do
It takes a lot work to have the bills get paid
But I guess it's just the price that you gotta pay to be a dad

Even though you're cranky I still love you, dad
Your clothes are out of style and you aren't half bad
well I need some advice to get me through this life

Your kids will get older before you know
Your skin will get wrinkly and your hair will show it
You're approaching the grave
I'll take of you just the same
I love you, dad.
Track Name: Song #21: I Don't Know
Out walking on a lonely day
Ain’t never gonna go my way
Cause the moment has come and passed
And there’s nothing but delays

I don’t mind
I don’t mind

It’s gonna be lonely day
So tell me it’s okay
But I don’t know

It’s raining on a cloudy day
There’s water on the window pane
And I can’t see through this mess
Cause I’ve lost the clarity

But I don’t mind
I don’t mind

It’s never gonna be today
When is it gonna go my way?
I don’t know

Well maybe it’s all pretend
And maybe I don’t know where I am for you
And I can’t see what you need
I don’t know what you need
I don’t know what you need

It’s never gonna be today
When is it gonna go my way?
I don’t know

Well maybe it’s all pretend
And maybe I don’t know where I am for you
There’s no one left to blame for all of my mistakes
All of my mistakes

It’s gonna be lonely day
So tell me it’s okay
But I don’t know
Track Name: Song #22: I Get By
Lit the fuse and blow it up
It’s out of the ashes that we begin to pick things up
You broke your leg, I lost my job
It’s gonna take everything to get back how it was

I Get By
I Get By

When I get back to your place To your place
It doesn’t take anytime to find any empty space
Was it love that caused this pain?
And I don’t need anything to have my mind erased

I Get By
I Get By
I Get By
And it goes on and on and on and on and on

I was wrong and you were right
Time has a way of making the outcome turn out fine
With better luck we’ll find a way
To get at the heart of our problems and make them go away

But I Get By
I Get By
I Get By
And it goes on and on and on and on and on
The beat goes on and on and on and on and on
Track Name: Song #23: Have I Loved You
I was a lost little child until
I found you then I knew
You are the only one for me
You are the only one I see

In my life have I loved you
If it’s right I will love you

How can I what I’m feeling now
I don’t know how
The moment you looked this way
I knew I was the only one to say

In my life have I loved you
If it’s right I will love you

You’re like an angel from heaven
Descending from the sky
I’ve you since the day we meet
Til the day we said goodbye

How I can what you want me to be
I guess we’ll see and I know
You are the only one for me
You are the only one I see

In my life have I loved you
If it’s right I will love you
In my life have I loved you
If it’s right I will love you
Track Name: Song #24: Underwater
Underneath the surface
Struggling for air
Stone tied to your ankle
Skin is turning pale
If I could reach you
I would set you free

Something keeps you down
Help is reaching out

Trapped beneath the surface
Of a crystal clear sea
Fell asleep with the fishes
Motionless as can be
If I could see you
I would set you free

Something keeps you down
Help is reaching out
Track Name: Song #25: Patience
All these years my wife has been good to me
Through the times when I failed
If you were under the present circumstances
You’d know how it felt

You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me

No excuses for the way I had treated you
What got into my head
At the time I could not find a better way
To put the demons to bed

You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me
You’ll have to wait for me
Track Name: Song #26: What Can I Say
When I was told I was one of those, no way, no way
If I only know then I’d tried to meet you some way
And I will grow and be so afraid, afraid
When nothing I can do saves me from myself

I fall away, only today
What can I say
I tried to be someone you only read about
I tried to be someone that you would want

Though I was told I don’t wanna know my fate, my fate
If I only know I would try to meet you some day
And I would grow and be so afraid, afraid
When nothing I can do saves me from myself

I tried to be strong but I only moved on from you
So tell me I’m wrong and I’ll try to move on from you

I fall away, only today
What can I say
I tried to be someone you only read about
I tried to be someone that you would want, you would want

I tried to be strong but I only moved on from you
So tell me I’m wrong and I’ll try to move on from you

I fall away, only today
What can I say
I tried to be someone you only read about
I tried to be someone that you would want, you would want
Track Name: Song #27: Descent Into Madness
Hold me down, take away my pain
Let it go, show me your apathy
Washed right through, diseased soul to stay
Empty space, no one understands your place

Hold me down, release my consciousness
Think it out, concentrated thoughts remain
Sending me on my own
You’re sending me on my own

You’re so alive it’s killing me
You’re so alive it’s killing me
So unclear, so afraid
So unclear, and so diseased

Hold me down, take away my misery
Enter now, open doors you await
Sending me on my own
You’re sending me on my own

You’re so alive it’s killing me
You’re so alive it’s killing me
Able minds, Lost at sea
Endless ways, so diseased